The psychologist told about the true causes of conflicts

All conflicts between people stem from differences in their value systems, goals, and resources. At the same time, the latter reason explains most of the disagreements that arise. This was told to Izvestia on November 14 by a practicing psychologist, consultant in business architecture and organizational development of OOO "Together.About" Danil Berezhnoy.

"When most people use the word "resource", they primarily have an image of money or something tangible. But resources are also time, energy, and a person's mental state. From a human point of view, resources can be divided into internal and external. Internal means knowledge, experience, skills, emotional stability, and even a picture of the world. The external ones are time, finances, and information," the specialist explained.

According to the psychologist, people can be divided into two groups in relation to a specific resource. For one person, something is an absolute value that requires careful treatment, while for another, it is an ordinary asset that can be easily sacrificed or neglected.

"There are three key causes of conflicts over resources: the first is the missed stage of agreements. People assume that their partner thinks the same way, and they face the problem after the fact, when resources are spent and expectations are not met," Berezhnoy explained.

The second reason, according to the expert, is the different strategies for managing resources based on individual values. This is how different approaches to resource allocation collide.

"The third is a different psychological pattern of stress. People's reactions to a shortage or exhaustion of resources are radically different. One person may panic if his plans are disrupted, while the other remains calm and resourceful, even when he goes into negative territory," the psychologist said.

To learn how to prevent conflicts, you need to pre-synchronize, find out each other's worldviews and attitudes to various resources, and discuss possible actions in the event of a crisis situation.

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