The psychologist named the main topics for discussion before marriage

Before getting married, it is important for partners to discuss financial issues, everyday life, relationships with relatives and plans for children, as differences in these areas most often cause conflicts. Ekaterina Krikunova, a psychology teacher and medical psychologist, told Izvestia about this on March 27.

According to the expert, one of the most controversial topics is the distribution of finances. It is important for future spouses to understand in advance how the family budget will be built, as different approaches to spending and saving often lead to quarrels. For example, one partner may prioritize entertainment, while the other may prioritize only essential needs. An equally important aspect is the organization of everyday life. The partners need to agree on the distribution of household responsibilities: cleaning, cooking, and other daily chores.

"Another difficult topic is relations with relatives. The frequency of communication with parents, the location of holidays, assistance to older generations — spouses may have different ideas about this," added Krikunova.

The couple should also compare their views on the birth and upbringing of children, including their desired number and timing of appearance in the family. Preparing for marriage involves discussing readiness for changes in habits and priorities after the wedding or the birth of a child. It is important to find out what each of the partners is not ready to give up for the sake of the family.

Tili-tili-dough: do we need children's weddings in Russia

The marriage game helps to form a positive attitude towards family life.

In addition, career and personal development issues can be a serious challenge, where a couple needs to choose between mutual support and competition. In the intimate sphere, psychologists advise discussing expectations of the quality and frequency of intimacy, including during pregnancy and after the birth of a child. To distinguish the partner's real priorities from the words spoken for the sake of consent, the specialist advises analyzing his actions in work and everyday situations.

"Pay attention to how the partner acts in real situations — at work, with friends, at home. For example, if he talks about the importance of family, but constantly avoids relationships with it, then there is a certain discrepancy between words and values," the specialist noted.

To identify the underlying motives, it is useful to use the technique of active listening and clarifying questions. It helps to understand the hidden needs of a loved one, for example, their need for stability or new experiences.

"By the way, there are those who "escape" into marriage from loneliness and financial difficulties...> Such motivation for starting a family is hardly good. It is worth solving your intrapersonal problems with the help of a psychologist, and not at the expense of a partner. Of course, our loved ones help us overcome difficulties by supporting us and taking care of us, but they should not be the ones who become a "pill" on their own, the psychologist concluded.

How to calculate a banquet for a wedding: norms of food and drinks per person

Detailed instructions on how many dishes and drinks are needed for a wedding per guest, how to calculate the budget and avoid overspending

Ilya Rusyaev, a business consultant and founder of the Rusyaev Club, said on March 15 that the main mistake couples make is that they often take out consumer loans to organize a wedding, which leads to financial difficulties.

All important news is on the Izvestia channel in the MAX messenger.