Psychologist explained the impact of the "Alpine divorce" on a person

A dangerous trend in relationships is gaining popularity on TikTok — the "Alpine divorce", which involves the demonstration of abusive behavior towards a partner. Olesya Tolstukhina, a clinical psychologist at the Doctor Nearby medical technology company, told Izvestia on March 4 about how such a trend can affect the human psyche.

According to the expert, the situation when a person intentionally leaves a partner in a dangerous environment is not limited to an ordinary conflict or an outburst of anger. It is important to take into account the context: whether there was a real threat, whether the person understood the consequences of his act, whether it was an impulsive gesture or a way to punish.

"In some cases, this may indeed be related to personality disorders, especially if such forms of cruel distancing are repeated, used as a way of pressure, or accompanied by devaluation. If such behavior became a reaction to conflict, followed by remorse and an understanding of danger, it is more about emotional immaturity and inability to withstand stress than about a persistent personality disorder. But when a person uses danger as an instrument of influence, it goes beyond just immaturity," Tolstukhina noted.

According to the clinical psychologist, the fear of being abandoned in a dangerous situation is one of the deepest human fears embedded in our nervous system. So, when a person finds himself alone in a potentially dangerous situation, his stress level increases significantly: pulse rate increases, blood pressure increases, breathing becomes shallow, muscles tense, trembling, a feeling of lack of air, heaviness in the chest, nausea, abdominal cramps may appear. The brain begins to look for a threat, and attention increases to external danger signals. Psychologically, this causes an increased sense of vulnerability and a need for protection. When the source of security — the partner — becomes the one who leaves in danger, this experience becomes especially acute, destroying the sense of predictability of the world.

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"In people with an anxious attachment type or childhood experience next to an emotionally unstable adult, the fear of being abandoned is more intense. For them, this is not just a situation, but a confirmation of the underlying scenario of "I will be abandoned." Therefore, the reaction is often disproportionately intense. It is important to understand that this is not about character weakness, but about the work of basic psychological mechanisms," the expert said.

If a person finds himself in a dangerous situation because of a conscious act of a partner, the reaction can be extremely acute, Tolstukhina added. This is not only fear, but also the experience of betrayal: when a source of security becomes a source of threat. In the early days, symptoms characteristic of acute stress disorder may appear: severe anxiety, tachycardia, trembling, a feeling of unreality, obsessive memories, sleep disorders.

An additional blow is inflicted on the attachment system. This is the feeling of losing a basic support: "if a loved one can do this, the world is not safe." Such experiences can lead to distrust, avoidance of intimacy, or, conversely, an anxious fixation on a partner and fear of repeating such a situation.

"In some cases, especially if the episode was accompanied by a real threat to health or life, it is possible to form a traumatic reaction with symptoms similar to post-traumatic stress disorder. However, much depends on individual resilience, previous experience, and the availability of support after the event. The key factor is not only the situation itself, but also whether the person is left alone with this experience or receives help and recognition that his reaction is normal for the stress he has experienced," Tolstukhina concluded.

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Inna Mirnaya, a psychologist and founder of the Institute of Family Psychology, which unites specialists working with families across the country, said on February 19 that in recent years, divorce among Russian couples has often become a conscious choice rather than a personal tragedy. According to her, in 2025-2026, the nature of breakups themselves is changing: they are less often associated with acute conflicts and more often with a gradual loss of emotional intimacy.

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