The therapist spoke about the signs of a neurotic need for recognition

The need for recognition, based on the natural human desire to be loved and respected, can take both healthy and destructive forms. The founder of the International Institute of Psychosomatic Health, psychotherapist Sergey Martynov, told Izvestia on January 17.

According to him, in people with traumatized minds who did not receive enough love and acceptance in childhood, this need often manifests itself in a hypertrophied form, turning into an unquenchable thirst for approval from a faceless crowd.

"Such individuals constantly experience inner dissatisfaction: no matter how much they have achieved, it seems to them that it is not enough, and sincere praise does not bring relief. This condition can lead to depressive dynamics, when a person, exhausted by self—eating, loses strength and closes in a vicious circle of lack of achievements," the specialist warned.

He explained that a negative worldview is being formed: a person perceives himself as unworthy, people as ungrateful, and the world as unfair, which makes it almost impossible to satisfy the need for recognition.

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At the same time, Martynov emphasized, there is a healthy side to the need for recognition. People who strive for self-realization naturally want their knowledge and good deeds to receive an objective assessment. Healthy self-esteem should grow with the achievement of results and be adjusted in case of failures, and the recognition of others becomes its natural consequence. In childhood, this function is performed by parents and school, in adulthood by colleagues, supervisors and the environment.

The key, according to the therapist, is to remain sensitive to external assessments with clear personal boundaries. It is important to analyze the motivation of those who give feedback and understand that support may be temporarily unavailable. Therefore, it is necessary to build your own self-assessment system, which will become a support during difficult periods.

Strengthening it is a time— and effort-consuming process that includes analyzing your strengths and weaknesses, setting realistic goals, taking care of your health, and surrounding yourself with supportive people.

"In difficult cases, you can seek help from a psychologist. Relying on inner confidence, a person is able to overcome difficulties, reach new heights and eventually regain well—deserved recognition from others," concluded the psychotherapist.

On December 3, Anastasia Cardiakos, a family psychologist and psychotherapist, told us how to regain control of attention and stop living in notification mode. She explained that the main principle of digital hygiene is to control your notifications on your devices.

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