The specialist announced the destruction of the relationship due to expectations

Expectations often become the cause of quarrels and breakups in couples. We create an ideal image of a partner, and then we unconsciously demand to match it. When a real person does not meet these expectations, resentment arises. Cognitive behavioral therapist Elina Landman told Izvestia on October 8 how to learn how to build a dialogue instead of making claims.

"Expectations arise involuntarily. We automatically "reward" our partner with the qualities we desire. During the period of falling in love, it seems that he fully corresponds to them. But when the euphoria subsides, we discover that he does not know how to read our thoughts and has his own "I". The wider the discrepancy between ideal and reality, the deeper the disappointment," said the specialist.

According to her, the main mistake people make is believing in telepathy. We expect our partner to guess our desires on his own, and if he doesn't guess, it means he doesn't love us. This leads to silent resentment and misunderstanding. Healthy relationships are built on dialogue, not guesswork.

Landman recommended sharing expectations, rechecking goals, and not being afraid to ask questions. By shifting the focus to yourself, you can understand why your partner's behavior is irritating. Conscious and articulate expectations will become a pillar, not a destructive force for relationships.

"Expectations are not the enemy of relationships. The enemy is the blind belief that they must come true by themselves. Conscious, articulate and jointly built expectations are a compass that helps a couple move in the same direction, and not a mine that tears them apart from the inside," the expert concluded.

In a successful search: what not to be afraid of when dating

Psychologist and matchmaker told how to establish a personal life without shyness

On August 28, psychologist Yulia Vorobyova told Izvestia how to build a happy relationship. According to her, it is important to share responsibility and agree on this in advance before problems arise. The specialist also drew attention to the fact that understanding each other's strategies is the key to good communication.

All important news is on the Izvestia channel in the MAX messenger.