Russians named topics and prohibitions for discussion on the first date
Men and women evaluate acceptable topics of conversation differently at the first meeting. About a third of men are willing to discuss sexual preferences on the first date, while among women, only 12% of respondents allow such a topic. At the same time, Russians consider the discrepancy of life values to be the main alarm signal in the stories of a potential partner. This is evidenced by the data from the Twinby dating service study, which was reviewed on July 24 by Izvestia.
According to the survey, the majority of Russians believe that openness in a conversation depends not so much on the level of trust as on how the dialogue develops. This opinion is shared by 61.5% of respondents. More than 80% of respondents prefer to start their acquaintance with neutral and abstract questions.
The most acceptable topics for the first meetings were work and career — 70.9% of the survey participants are ready to discuss them. 61.7% of Russians are ready to talk about future plans. At the same time, women are more likely than men to raise the topic of requirements for a partner: 43.3% of women support such a conversation compared to 34.2% of men.
23% of the respondents are ready to discuss their political views on the first date. At the same time, men and women differ markedly in their attitudes towards talking about sexual preferences: 35% of men are ready to touch on such a topic, while only 12% of women are ready to touch on such a topic.
As the relationship develops, the topics for communication also change. In mature couples, sex life becomes the most important — 57.8% of Russians discuss it. The second place was taken by family issues, which are of interest to 54.8% of respondents. The third place was taken by conversations about life mistakes — 41% of the study participants are ready to make them.
Abstract topics, which often help to start an acquaintance, lose their importance in a long-term relationship. Only 24.5% of the respondents continue to discuss them. Russians called the cardinal divergence of values the main "red flag" in the partner's stories — 62.3% of the study participants pointed this out. Negative statements about other people (50.7%) and a person's tendency to constantly praise themselves (48.7%) also cause alertness.
Women are more likely than men to pay attention to negative statements about others. 63.3% of women and 37.2% of men consider this sign to be alarming. However, the presence of alarms does not always cause communication to end. More than 60% of Russians will first try to figure out the situation, and only 15.2% are ready to end the relationship immediately.
The study also showed that some Russians prefer to keep certain topics secret, even in relationships. About a third of the respondents (31.8%) said that they do not have forbidden topics to communicate with their partner. However, 48.5% will never tell the other half their personal secrets. In addition, 24.5% of respondents are willing to hide traumatic events from the past, and 21.4% are willing to hide actions they regret.
Natalia Krasilnikova, PR director of the Mamba online dating service, told Izvestia on April 20 that a sharp decrease in interest in correspondence at the start of dating is often due not to a lack of sympathy, but to the wrong choice of topics and the presentation of the dialogue. The expert stressed that even neutral questions can spoil the impression if they sound like a series of checks. When the dialogue turns into a series of clarifications about work, income, or intentions, the interlocutor feels like an interrogation rather than a live conversation.
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