The therapist called the main danger of striving for the ideal

The desire to perform high-quality work and achieve high results is a normal and useful personality trait. However, pathological perfectionism can lead to chronic stress, anxiety, emotional exhaustion, and even health problems. Irina Krashkina, a psychotherapist at JSC "Medicine" (Academician Roitberg clinic), Candidate of Medical Sciences, told Izvestia about this on July 17.

According to the expert, the main difference between a healthy pursuit of perfection and destructive perfectionism lies in the attitude towards mistakes. If a person sees mistakes as an opportunity to gain experience and become better, it's about healthy motivation. With pathological perfectionism, any mistake turns into a threat to self-esteem.

"A person doesn't think, 'I did something imperfectly,' but, 'there's something wrong with me.' Achievements cease to bring satisfaction and become a constant test of one's own worth," Krashkina explained.

The expert noted that the constant desire to meet unattainable standards creates chronic tension. The body is under stress for a long time, which is accompanied by an increase in cortisol levels and can negatively affect sleep, the immune system and emotional state.

According to the doctor, people with severe perfectionism are much more likely to experience anxiety, sleep disorders, emotional exhaustion, fatigue, headaches, muscle tension, eating problems, as well as exacerbation of chronic stress-related diseases.

The specialist paid special attention to the connection between perfectionism and procrastination. At first glance, it seems paradoxical that a person who strives to do everything perfectly constantly postpones tasks. However, it is the fear of not coping that causes this behavior.

"Procrastination in this case is not a manifestation of laziness, but an attempt to reduce anxiety. When a task is perceived as a test of one's own worth, it becomes psychologically difficult for a person to even start work," the psychotherapist explained.

Mental collapse: there are not enough qualified psychologists in Russia

The most acute shortage of personnel is among specialists working with adolescents, cancer patients, and combat veterans.

In addition, pathological perfectionism is closely related to impostor syndrome. Even after achieving objective success, a person is inclined to explain his achievements by chance or a lucky combination of circumstances, continuing to consider himself insufficiently competent.

According to Krashkina, perfectionism also increases the risk of developing anxiety and depression. The constant comparison of oneself with an unattainable ideal leads to a feeling of chronic dissatisfaction, and the nervous system operates in a mode of constant assessment and expectation of a possible mistake.

The specialist emphasized that striving for the ideal is often reflected in personal life. Excessive demands apply not only to the person himself, but also to others, which can manifest itself in criticism, the inability to accept the shortcomings of a partner, the fear of showing their own weakness and the inability to relax around loved ones.

According to the doctor, the roots of perfectionism are often formed in childhood, if the child feels that the love and approval of adults depend solely on his achievements. In such cases, there is an attitude that a person's value is determined only by success.

The expert advises getting rid of destructive perfectionism gradually. To do this, it is important to learn how to perform certain tasks "well enough", notice your own achievements, allow yourself to rest without feeling guilty, compare yourself with yourself in the past, and not with other people, and also accept the fact that mistakes are a natural part of development.

"True development begins not when a person becomes perfect, but when he stops spending all his energy fighting his own imperfection," Krashkina concluded.

Andrey Nevryuev, an assistant at the Department of Pedagogy and Medical Psychology at the Institute of Psychological and Social Work at Sechenov University, warned about the alarming signals of digital addiction in an interview with Izvestia on February 20. According to him, this may be indicated by a decrease in interest in real life and an inability to control the time spent online.