A psychologist cited insecurity as one of the causes of jealousy

Jealousy becomes the cause of about 12-14% of murders. Lubov Lysenko, a practicing psychologist and lecturer at the Smart International Institute of Psychology, explained in an interview with " Gazeta.Ru" on Thursday, December 12, why one should not believe the words "jealous means love".

The expert said that relationships built on the feeling of jealousy, when one partner catches up and the other runs away to inflame feelings, are unhealthy.

"Jealousy comes in varying degrees of intensity and sometimes takes a frankly unsafe form. It is worth looking at the statistics of criminal chronicles: every eighth murder is committed out of jealousy - 12-14% of the total number," - said the psychologist.

In cases when a partner is jealous, Lysenko advised not to look for the problem in yourself and not to fall into self-accusations. She emphasized: a person prone to jealousy is able to invent a picture of treason himself, even if there was no reason for suspicion.

"The root of the jealousy problem is insecurity, low self-esteem and fear of losing a man. The origins of such a state, most likely, formed in childhood. The reasons for this can be: "cold mother", divorce of parents, lack of a significant empathic adult, birth of another child in the family, trauma of rejection and other reasons", - said the specialist.

The psychologist advised practicing in the couple "trust hours", which are honest conversations about feelings, allowing to discuss problems in the relationship, if they arise. She also recommended couples or individual psychotherapy. You can also engage in self-education: Lysenko suggested reading Robert Leahy's book "Jealousy. How to live with it and keep the relationship.

If the situation in the couple is only getting worse, the partner is becoming more controlling and aggressive - you need to assert your boundaries and protect yourself.

"Remember that jealousy is a sign of anxiety, which shows that there are problems in your relationship. Do not turn a blind eye to it, otherwise the situation may worsen," - concluded the specialist.

Earlier, on September 17, it was reported that the dating app "Mamba" conducted a study, according to which 78% of Russians of both sexes admitted that they are interested in the past relationships of the partner. The study showed that more than half of modern men (60%) and women (66%) consider themselves jealous, but only in cases when there are obvious reasons for this. Almost a quarter of men (22%) and women (24%) described themselves as 'very jealous'.